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And Now for Something…
Posted by Bowden McElroy in Church & Missions
…completely different.
My daughter is moving to Baton Rouge, La. She asked if I knew any good churches in Baton Rouge. “No”, I told her, “I only know every pastor in Oklahoma; I don’t know every pastor every where.” (The girls know – intellectually – that I can’t possibly know EVERY pastor, but so far I’ve not been stumped when they tell me they met someone and asked if I know him. The family myth is Dad knows every pastor in the state. The myth still exists; I’m just having to redefine it.)
If you know of any church, please leave a comment.
Let me tell you a little bit about my daughter. She’s in her early 20s, a recent college graduate, and a newlywed. They have no children. At one point in her life I was an associate pastor at a mega-church. At another time, my wife was the Children’s Director of a new church plant. So she’s been exposed to both large and small churches and is comfortable in either one (although, I think my son-in-law prefers a smaller congregation).
Ed Stetzer’s description of SBC Impact! (Somewhat reformist, less strident) fits her as well. Missions are important to her: she’s been traveling the world on short term mission trips since she was 15. That includes a summer in Uganda with an IMB missionary: I’ll have to get her to write some of her experiences and try and talk the powers-that-be into letting her be a guest contributor; she’s got some amazing stories.
She and her husband believe missional is more a lifestyle than a theological term. She’s committed to doctrine that reflects the BF&M but has little patience for those she thinks are attempting to elevate tradition to the level of scripture. She loves being SBC but is willing to look at any church with similar beliefs; she’s wedded to her husband, not a denomination.
I have encouraged her to read as much C.S. Lewis as possible. My daughter, in turn, introduced me to John Piper’s books. The two remain her favorite authors.
So… any ideas on a church where she and her husband might fit in? At least until ExxonMobil moves my son-in-law again… at which time I’ll be sending out another request and trying to keep the myth alive.
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Bowden,
Is she moving into the Ascension Parish (Southeast of Baton Rouge on I-10 East) area or into Eastern Baton Rouge/Denham Springs/Livingston Parish area (I-12)?
Bowden,
I was glad to hear that she was a “college graduate.” I was concerned that she had succumbed to matriculating at LSU, the home of the one of the enemies of every red blooded Sooner fan. Thankfully she has not been taken over by those mangy tigers.
Boomer Sooner!
Rob
Stuart,
They haven’t decided, yet. ExxonMobil will be putting them up in a hotel for the next month. I think they’ve been looking to the north of the plant… don’t know which parish that is.
Rob,
I do have a niece who, having heard that LSU has been ranked the nation’s number 1 party school, is planning on attending LSU. (Given her motivation, I have doubts about whether or not she’ll actually graduate from there.) (And, we – me, my wife, and my daughter – are all Okla. State alums; not too concerned about what Sooner fans think.)
Bowden,
My name is Matt Surber, and I serve as the Pastor of Istrouma Baptist Church in Baton Rouge. We are a large church with a missional heart, casual in feel, lots of young married couples, pretty contemporary. I would love to have your family come and visit with us. Our web site is http://www.istrouma.org, or you can have them call the office and ask for me and I will answer any questions possible.
Reach for Life!
Matt
To All,
There are some topics that could be discussed here.
The whole idea of looking for a church is one.
Matt,
Thanks!
“And, we – me, my wife, and my daughter – are all Okla. State alums; not too concerned about what Sooner fans think.”
Alas, for shame
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Rob
Bowden,
I will take a bite on your proposal to talk about looking for a church, in general.
I think that, when situations in our life warrant looking for a new local congregation (just when that may or may not be is a different question altogether), the most important consideration is not where we feel we personally “fit in” or like the worship style, or pastor, etc. Neither is it where we feel we are “fed.” It is, rather, where we feel we will be able to make the best contribution towards the advance of God’s Kingdom. Where will our gifts and efforts in serving the Lord really be used to their fullest? We are all stewards who will one day have to answer before the Lord. Some local congregations provide us with better opportunities to be better stewards than others. I think this is a crucial concern, if not the most important of all, we should keep in mind, when it comes time to go “church shopping.”
David,
I’m always interested in how people experience a “call” from the Lord; whether it is a call to ministry or a call to join with a local congregation.
I can agree with you that contribution is a key factor; perhaps you would agree it is not the only factor. I think fitting-in (preferences) and being fed (discipleship) are important. I think the likelihood of being able to make a significant contribution increases if the fit is good and the opportunities exist for me (and my family members) to be fed.
Bowden,
Yes, I agree that contribution is not the only factor, and that “fitting in” and “being fed” can indeed have a positive correlation with contribution. I also agree that it is important, as parents, to be in a church where your kids are “being fed.” However, I think the tendency for most people, when searching for a church, is to over-emphasize “fitting in” and “being fed” and neglect the contribution factor. That is, in my opinion, basically a self-centered approach.
Bowden,
Sorry, I don’t anything about the churches in the northern part of BR or West Feliciana.
This may sound trite, but I’d say the most important consideration in choosing a new congregation is “Where does God want us?”. What looks to be the best opportunity for contribution, what seems to be the best personal fit, what seems to be the best opportunity to be fed may very well be indicators of that, but if “Where does God want us?” isn’t the first consideration, it leaves the impression that the decision is merely up to us, to be decided on the basis on Biblically-derived principles, no doubt, but nevertheless something we can decide on our own without trying to get input from God.
I’m not trying to make this utterly mystical/emotional (I quite realize that some people take that to extremes), but it seems to me there is a difference between the attitude “God has moved us here, He has a congregation where He wants us to plug in, how do we find it?” vs “We’ve moved to a new place, now it’s up to us to figure out what congregation we want to join.”
Oloryn,
Agreed.
David:
The ironic thing is that I realize that I was basically responding to the ‘the first consideration’ terminology. Express it in terms that looking for a place to contribute should take priority over feeling that you fit in or would be fed, and you’d find me right there beside you, as it seems to me that too many people approach church membership from a “getting my needs/wants met” perspective.
David and Oloryn,
So much in western consumer-driven society promotes the highest good being that people get what they want. In fact, for many Christians it may be a foreign idea that what God wants for their lives may not be what they personally desire. God may be sending His servants into a personally undesirable situation to be His agent of change in that situation (most missionaries experience this).
Neither is the need automatically the call from God. There is far too much need in this world and in the churches for any one individual to address every need. Instead, the highest good for each servant is to find the place(s) God wants to use them to increase His kingdom there.
Although I believe that it is a good thing for people to like/love the church they are in, it is my opinion that those who join a church for the primary purpose that they “like it” — for whatever reason, music, preaching, programs, etc. — are thinking mainly of themselves. The Master may have something else in mind. He may have a need somewhere else that He has specifically gifted this servant to address.
Kevin,
As usual, great words. Amen!
So… when I have conversations with people about getting involved in a church (a topic that occurs regularly in my counseling practice) and I say to them “go where God wants you” the next question in “How do I know where God wants me?”
I agree that getting rid of a “what can you do for me” mentality is vitally important.
But, since we can’t open the bible and find a verse that says “Bowden: go and join FBC County Seat”, then I have to discern God’s will in other ways.
And that’s where I think it IS okay to assess things like preferences, discipleship opportunities, the youth or children’s ministries, proximity, etc.
Another way to ask the question is: how do we exercise discernment in joining a church?
Bowden,
I liken finding a church much to a marriage. With a certain amount of compatibility and an awful lot of commitment a marriage can work. Physical and emotional attraction can help in a marriage, but they make a weak basis for longevity in the relationship. In much the same way, a person’s relationship with their church has to be based on more than attraction. God not only wants to be involved in “joining” people together in marriage (Matt 19:6) but also in “placing members in the body as He desires” (1 Cor 12:18). The Father’s lead has to be primary in this relationship.
I encourage people indeed to look around, but to look for different things than mere likes, dislikes, and attraction. For instance, “Where is this church headed?” I want to know where a plane is going before I get onto it. Is there a compatibility between my calling and giftedness and the mission of this church? The various ministries, the values displayed in the church budget, etc. will demonstrate these things.
“Are there people here with whom I can experience genuine koinonia?” This question may not be answered right away, but at least the potential for genuine koinonia can be observed almost immediately. A church is a community of believers linked together as a body, not merely a congregation that attends a worship service. Can I link myself to these people? Will they allow me to be linked to them?
“Can I at least tolerate, and to some extent, worship in the worship experience?” Some worship practices and styles can be an obstacle to some in their worship. People should be afforded an opportunity to worship somewhat in their idiom in their local church. If the worship is indeed a hindrance to worship (and this goes beyond mere likes and dislikes), then I advise finding a place where you can worship.
“Are there opportunities to serve the Lord and use my gifts in service here?” We hold a stewardship to God for the gifts He has given us. We need to find an outlet to use those gifts in ministry.
Finally, and most importantly, “What is the Lord telling me as I study and attend this church?” This comes down to a person’s personal walk with God. Henry Blackaby teaches that if a person cannot hear God speaking, they have trouble in the very heart of their Christian experience. However God speaks to each individual, they need to know when God is speaking and what He is saying. We have to believe that no one wants a person to know God’s will more than God does; therefore, we have to listen to Him. For me, I place a lot of stock in His peace on my heart. God rewards obedience with His peace. As soon as I am disobedient, the peace leaves. Therefore, I “go with the peace.”
For what it’s worth.
Kevin,
Well said.