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Reporting Sexual Abuse
Posted by Bowden McElroy in Uncategorized
“As a pastor, do I have to report sexual abuse?”
The question above was a search phrase that sent someone to my web site. I hope they found what they were looking for. Just in case I haven’t spelled it out clearly enough before (and because I think SBC Impact! has a different readership), I’m offering Impact! readers a re-posting of something I put up earlier this week on my site. 
Yes! At least in Oklahoma you do. The law (10-7103) is typical of most states and can be summed up this way:
State law requires every health care professional, teacher and every OTHER person who has reason to believe that a child under 18 is being abused or neglected or is in danger of being abused or neglected, to report the suspicion of abuse to the Department of Human Services (DHS).
Failure to report suspected abuse is a crime. No person, regardless of their relationship to the child or family, is exempt from reporting suspected abuse. A person reporting in good faith, however, is immune from both civil and criminal liability.
By law, reporting child abuse is an individual responsibility. As the individual who suspects abuse, you are legally responsible for making certain that the report is made to DHS. If you have obtained the information leading to your suspicions from a professional relationship, your legal responsibility is NOT satisfied by merely reporting your suspicions to a supervisor. If applicable, it is important to follow your agency’s or school’s procedures regarding informing a superior of your concerns, but permission to report is not necessary. You must not let organizational procedures or policy obstruct your duty to report to DHS.
A report is a request for an investigation to gather facts and protect the child. The individual making the request does not need proof of the abuse prior to reporting. Investigation and validation of child abuse reports are the responsibility of DHS or law enforcement officials. If you become aware of additional incidents after the initial report has been made, another report to DHS with the additional concerns and information should be made.
So here are the questions I wish the anonymous, web searching pastor had asked:
1. What is reportable? The answer is suspected child abuse. Another way to ask that is would a reasonable person suspect abuse has occurred? I don’t necessarily believe every thing reported to me is abuse. For example, a mother tells me her three-year-old was molested by an “older boy”. Closer questioning reveals the “older boy” is about 5 months older and the two were playing some form of “you show me yours and I’ll show you mine”. I suspect age appropriate curiosity, not sexual abuse. Or, a dramatic and resentful father in the middle of a high conflict divorce tells me he suspects his soon-to-be-ex’s new boyfriend of molesting their child but has only vague and unsubstantiated fears with no clear support to his contention of abuse. I’m more likely to see that as either histrionics or deviousness than actual child abuse. If all else fails, call the Child Welfare hotline and give them the scenario without revealing any names. At the end of the conversation ask, “Is this reportable”? I’ve had case workers tell me, no, this particular case is not reportable.
2. What does your church policy say about reporting abuse? Remember, the law holds the individual accountable for reporting suspected abuse (not the institution), but a good policy in place will guide you in determining whether or not a reasonable person would suspect abuse. It also affords some distance between you and the family (“My hands were tied; state law and church policy left me no options”).
3. Why wouldn’t you want to report suspected abuse? I’ve written before about some of my pet peeves surrounding this issue. The responses I usually hear fall into one of three categories:
First, there is the “I don’t know for sure abuse has occurred” category. Again, it’s not our job to investigate child abuse; it’s our job to report suspected abuse. The rule of thumb is what would a reasonable person think. I think of this as the Sunday school test: if I walked in to a typical Sunday school class and laid out a hypothetical case, would the majority of adults present suspect abuse? If the answer is “yes”, then reporting should occur.
Next, there is the “Let’s keep it in the (church) family and deal with it ourselves”. This idea is at best naive and at worst arrogant. A corollary to this line of thinking is “I don’t want anyone to go to jail”. Brother, if you truly believe that, you belong in jail right next to the abuser.
Finally, there is the category of “How can I minister to the family if I’m the bad guy who reported the situation”? This is the reason for hesitating to report that I have some sympathy with. I know several ministers who have referred the family to me for counseling knowing I’ll have to report the case and leaving them free to minister to the whole family without any stigma attached. It’s not exactly following the letter of the law, but it gets the job done. Just be sure and follow up: if they don’t reveal anything to the therapist then he or she has nothing to report and the pastor is still on the hook.
There is a reality pastors must face when reporting suspected child abuse: you will stir up a hornet’s nest, not just in the family, but possibly in your congregation as well. Let me speak bluntly, if you’re afraid of the conflict that is likely to occur, then you may need to re-examine your call to ministry. Real ministry is often messy and conflict-laden; if you try to spend your pastorate avoiding conflict you will end up making poor decisions. It’s tough to show people how to live when your head is buried in the sand.
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Believe it or not Bowden, Missouri ministers were exempt from reporting until the statutes were changed last year. Now the statute as been amended in Missouri to require ministers to report suspected child abuse to the proper authorities (Section 352-400 MO as amended August 28, 2007). Churches and ministers have been held civilly liable however for failure to report despite the exemption – the Legislature merely changed the statute to reflect the reality. Yet what minister does not desire to report child abuse? I really do not understand the problem.
Rob
Rob,
Thanks for the info.
Re: “what minister does not desire to report child abuse?” I can only tell you that my experience is “lots”. It’s usually based in fear: fear of suspecting abuse where none exists, fear of being seen as the bad guy by the family and not being able to continue ministering to anyone, and fear of causing problems within the church.
Brother Bowden,
I want to ask something but I do not want to end up in your “pet peeve” list. ;>)
Seriously, and this is where I have suspicion with some law enforcement agencies due to my background before salvation, but there needs to be a better definition for “suspected abuse or neglect.” While you are correct if one would check first this would be able to be resolved, that is not the case on the whole.
I give one example. If my child does something in public that needs discipline to the point of a spanking, I have one thing that crosses my mind–will someone try to report me for child abuse. I have set discipline for set boundaries broken and my child knows those boundaries. I have, on occasion, taken my child to the car at the mall in order not to embarrass her in public, but I spanked her in the car. My concern the entire time was that someone may have seen me pop her once or twice, depending on the boundary that was broken, and felt it was child abuse.
Here is where my past comes into play. While the law says innocent until proven guilty, once the report is written, your child is subject to be removed from your home. Any resistance that you place to the state removing your child from the home is viewed as harboring a child in a dangerous situation. While, some may say that it is okay to miss one like this as long as you can save one from real abuse, it does not solve the problem.
I do not want to come across as trying to protect those that abuse children, but I also do not want parents to be treated like criminals just because they are trying to discipline their children in a proper manner.
Blessings,
Tim
Brother Bowden,
I need to explain my past a little better. Neither I nor anyone I know has been involved in a child abuse case. At one ministry I reported a case and the deputies investigated. Once the investigation was over, I was the bad guy with those that knew the family. I knew what I saw and testified to such. But the family accused me of being uncaring for the children. The judge then placed the children in the home of the grandparent. However, that case is not what I am referencing.
My experience before salvation is that law enforcement agencies operate from a theory. If they form a theory of abuse it is then up to the accused to prove the theory false. Do you know how hard it is for someone to prove that false?
Oh, also you need to read the two articles in the following two links. That is another case that proves my point that this stuff happens.
http://praisegodbarebones.blogspot.com/2008/02/fighting-for-will.html
http://www.fightingforwill.com/
Blessings,
Tim
Tim,
Each state is allowed to define “abuse” but the Feds set a minimum standard. That standard is:
Spanking doesn’t meet the definition of “serious harm” (unless we’re talking about California, then all bets are off).
Additionally, many states specifically acknowledge the parental right to engage in corporal punishment as a means of child discipline. Add to that the idea that most child welfare offices are over-burdened and under-staffed and I think your fears are ungrounded. I understand your thinking – I’ve heard many people say the same thing – but I haven’t had any experience in that happening. My experience has been the opposite: DHS is most often s-l-o-w to act.
As far as loud-mouthed, busy-bodies go… tell them to go ahead and call and remind them it’s against the law to file a false report!
Tim,
Before I could comment on “Fighting for Will” I would want to see the court transcript and the custody evaluator’s report.
The article on the web site you listed just doesn’t “feel right”. I suspect there’s another side to the story that isn’t being presented to the public.
If it is correct, and there are no more facts to be learned, then: a) this is why high-conflict divorces are tragic… the children always lose and b) I suspect the Dallas courts will set things right sooner rather than later.
Bowden,
Regarding Jim & Linda Dawkins’s situation, I started out with the same skepticism. It doesn’t feel right. That’s why I was so shocked to discover how accurate the story is. I’m now convinced.
I haven’t read the entire thread and I’m not sure what this has to do with the reporting of abuse. We’re fanatical about that around here and I imagine that I could give a hearty “Amen” to anything you would say on that subject.
As to the Dallas courts sorting things out, I surely hope so, and I see reason for hope.
In the meantime, surely we can all agree that some people are dysfunctional in the head, obsessed with vindictiveness, control issues, etc. We can also agree that it is possible to have all of these problems and still have either the money or the legal knowledge to use the court system as a weapon for abuse.
After all, we’ve seen that the criminal court system is imperfect and able to be used against people. Prejudice sometimes victimizes people in criminal proceedings. Differing resources can lead to different outcomes in criminal proceedings. Does the family court system possess some magical talisman to make it impervious to these same phenomena?
I’m headed out of town and can’t stick with the thread, so I’ll leave you all to sort it out.
Tracking back a little to try to gain context, I clarify that the Dawkins’ situation has nothing to do with CPS (the Texas agency that deals with claims of abuse).
I’ll add one other story, and then I’ll make good on my promise to leave. We reported a claim of abuse by a cousin in the home made by a teenaged girl in our youth group. After we made the report, she came to us begging us to withdraw it. She said that the had made the whole thing up. I suspected as much to begin with—she thrived on attention—but her parental situation wasn’t great and we were going to err on the side of caution (not to mention the law).
Well, we told her that we couldn’t withdraw the report, that she could be coming to us under duress, and that it was all in CPS’s hands at that point. CPS investigated, found that it was a false claim, and ended the investigation. The girl left our youth group and went somewhere else. And that was the end of that.
Bart,
Thanks for stopping by. Tim brought up the Dawkins to make the point (I think) that the legal system makes it difficult to prove the absence of abuse. I think the system (child welfare, not child custody/divorce cases) most often works the other way: too slow to act and looking for physical evidence (bruises,etc.) before placing children outside the home.
I know your church has faced this situation before… and I know you have not backed off from protecting kids. I’m just amazed at the number of ministers I’ve run into who are slow to act. And the number of churches that have no policy for reporting abuse.
Brother Bowden,
You are correct I did bring this up to make a point that the legal system makes it difficult to prove the absence of abuse. That is the point. Oh, one more thing, the Dawkins situation is not something secret, they have a blog explaining their entire story. I am not saying anyone has implied I have done something that I should not have, I am just pointing out they have made it public in order to help right a wrong.
I am all for making certain that abuse and neglect get reported. I am also for making certain that a child is not taken out of a loving, nurturing environment just because some official feels they know better how to raise a child than the parent.
Blessings,
Tim
I have a good friend who trains CPS departments all over. She is now in London training.
She says exactly what the author here says. It is rare for a false claim to make it to court. The few that do, are the big headlines. She said from CPS’ point of view, they too, need credibility with the family court judges. And all departments are understaffed and slow. And no, they do not see typical spanking as abuse.
However the cases that rarely get reported or make it to court are the sexual abuse cases. Would you guys be shocked to know that about 1 in 5 kids/pre-teen is sexually abused to some degree? Whether it is inappropriate touch or worse by someone older… mostly by adult males. This is nothing to sneer at. it is serious and really affects a child for life. Especially when it is someone who should be protecting them like a parent, teacher or minister.
Unfortuantly, we have covered up some of these situations in the SBC. We should be crying out for the victims instead of protecting the perps.
Brother/Sister Lin,
I do not believe this is about anyone protecting perps. As to your friend’s integrity, I have no reason to doubt it. However, you may need to speak to those who have had their children removed from them because of a charge, unfounded and ill conceived, made by one of the governmental workers. It is also curious that during the times that I reported suspicion, it was revealed that nothing could be done. You know why? The perp, who was a registered sex offender was living in the home full of children under the age of 11, but it was his grandchildren. There was abuse suspected and reported, but nothing could be done. But, an individual in the same community spanked their child with a pop on the bottom in the local grocery store, and the child was removed from the home until DSS could make certain the home was a stable environment. Oh, the first individual was on the lamb of the state and county. The second individual was an upstanding citizen in the community. As for the second individual, their status in the community will be forever questioned. Oh, and the child has been affected for life because of where they were placed during the investigation period.
I know that our system is not perfect. All I am trying to say is there needs to be an extra amount of concern given to those with no previous record of any such thing.
You may say that my case is isolated also. But it is curious that I can give you a case like this, and then point you to a case in Texas where a child has been removed from a home because the father says the mother is being abusive by telling the child the truth about salvation.
I am not for throwing out the system. I am for protecting children. I am saying there needs to be some oversight to ensure innocent people do not have their character or children’s psyche destroyed because of an overzealous system.
Blessings,
Tim
Bowden,
I believe Tim and others are describing the hesitancy of any reporting individual to make that final leap before knowing “for sure.” The system is slow in responding – it is just as slow in reversing a reactive decision, and pride often times gets in the way of correcting a grevious wrong with families and the children getting the wrong end.
In our common home town of Tulsa, I was going through Sam’s Club one Saturday (this was about 1987). I noted a young mother with a toddler child in a cart. This mother and child would cycle a set of behaviors that several patrons noticed: Mom would stop to look or pick up some merchandise – child would also pick up merchandise at the same time – Mom would say “no,” hit the child on the hand, and take the item from the child and place it back on shelf – The child would not cry or pout at all – but the pat did not keep the child from picking up the merchandise at the next stop.
I happened to be at check out the same time mom and child was. Standing in the back were two police officers and a “passionate”lady. They stopped Mom and informed her that they had recieved a tip (from “passionate”) about abuse in the store, and were present to take herself and her child in custody. A member of DFS was on the way (and in fact arrived in the 45 minute melee that followed) to take custody of the child into protective custody.
There were several onlookers (like myself) her could not but help overhear this altercation who were shocked! For one the “abuse” was a swat on the hand and a “no” which did not cause the child any pain. In fact it was completely ineffective as a corrective toward the inappropriate behavior of picking up merchandise. Despite this, never in a million years did we onlookers (with the exception of “passionate”) believe that what we witnessed was abuse.
Short of the story is that the other witnesses did not let this stand. We each gave a statement to the officers what we saw. Yet it did not seem to stem the tide – the officers and social worker on the word of “passionate” were intent to remove the child and take Mom into custody. That is when one of the witnesses went beserk (or at least showed a little anger and hostility, for up to then everybody had been calm with the exception of Mom). You see, he was a lawyer, a partner in a major duty litigation firm in Tulsa. And while a majority of his work (he confided) was suing corporations, he handed his card to Mom, promised that he or one of the firm would represent her pro bono in both her criminal as well as civil suits in which he would name the state and “passionate” as defendents in a “false and malicious” abuse report. He referred to it as a “box car” case – a lot of money at the end of it. With this announcement, social worker and “passionate” had a winded discusion for about 5 minutes – and then came back and decided to not pursue the case – with the relief of all of us standing there.
I believe that cases like this inhibit all of us to take that first step – we have all heard of them. Just thought I would throw that in.
Rob
Here is an example of a recent case that causes us reporting individuals a little hesitancy and due caution. This was found in the Reader’s Digest – an family was accused of abuse of an infant who had osteogenesis imperfecta (OI), “brittle bone disease” – and the “slowness” of the authorities including physicians to retreat from a reactive decision which cost the taxpayers $950,000.
http://www.rd.com/stories/drama/parents-wrongly-accused-of-child-abuse/article.html
Rob
Thanks for sharing all the ‘wrongly accused’ stories. I can see now why so many in our churches do not believe the victims of sexual abuse. Sorry, but a few stories of a wrong system applied does not excuse ignoring sexual abuse as we have done in the SBC.
You hate the system more than you care about victims.
I can also see why having a pedophile minister of prayer at the flagship SBC church is no big deal, either. It sure did not hurt the pastor to protect him and keep him in ministry. Strange how even our SBC leaders have protected this man and never spoke out about him ignoring scriptural qualifications of a minister. One would think this would outrage you guys. There are plenty of other examples that have not seemed to outrage the SBC leadership. Of course churches are autonomous but to not even rebuke him publicly? To teach others?
You do realize that because of the way we have dealt with sexual abuse in church that it is fast becoming an unsafe place for kids.
Go ahead and focus on the bad system. The perps (who sometimes are ministers and youth pastors) are counting on it.
Lin,
You said,
“Thanks for sharing all the ‘wrongly accused’ stories. I can see now why so many in our churches do not believe the victims of sexual abuse. Sorry, but a few stories of a wrong system applied does not excuse ignoring sexual abuse as we have done in the SBC.”
Who in the name that is all holy said on this thread that because there are “wrongly accused” stories we should ignore real abuse? I did not. Bart did not. Tim did not. Who pray tell did? Provide the name. Otherwise clam down on the hyperbole, hatred, and vitriol. These examples offered merely provided a variable for consideration, a reason why some may be hesitant to pull the trigger on a state investigation, wanting to truly make sure of the facts before putting a truly innocent family in the cross hairs of the state. I have not hesitated in the least to report families to the authorities for abuse, sexual or otherwise – and have done it at least six times – which included a member of my own family – and in each instance my report was found to be “founded” and in fact required state intervention for each.
You do not know me. You do not know my church. You do not know of the controls and protections we have placed in our congregation to protect our young ones from harm. You would broad brush every body on this thread because we would dare to consider all of the various angles, including the incidents of false reporting and state inquisitions that have been found to be not founded in fact. The incident of false accusations according to the experts range from 6% to 35% of the total number of accusations (with the other being either “founded” or “unfounded”). False accusations in churches are especially disconcerting – the same sword that would come down when a church fail to report is the same sword that would come down if a report was made that would be considered to be “unfounded” or even “malicious.” Ask anyone involved in the mass-hysteria that surrounded some day care centers in the ’80′s and ’90′s and the families and people involved in them concerning the price of false accusations made against them (Kern County California, The McMartin preschool trial, Dade County day care center, Fell’s Acres Day Care Center, Little Rascals Day Care Center, the Wanatchee Sex Ring, ad nauseum). Wonder again why some question the “shot gun” approach to this you seem to take. Each of the cases above involved false accusations of child sex abuse, accrued to innocent people who later were sent to prison who much later had their convictions overturned. The taxpayers have been paying restitution for lives ruined ever since. Lin, there is another side to this – it so important that we be cautious and deliberating before the slow hand of the state gets involved. Once the pin is pulled out of the grenade, it cannot be placed back. Let us make doubly sure that we have a perp in our sights before we take them down.
You said,
“You hate the system more than you care about victims.”
No, I am cautious of the system. Like any weapon, it can be used properly and for good. If used poorly, it will take down innocent victims for no good reason. Are you really willing to accept collateral damage in your crusade? Once the genie is out of the bottle, there is no putting it back. Did you read about the systemic abuse of both innocent parents and the child in the Reader’s Digest article I offered? Or are these stories a little bit uncomfortable for you? What I hope they do is make you pause for a moment.
I support the SBC having a method so that we can keep track of pedophiles. No problem there, and I truly do not understand the hesitancy of some to get this accomplished. I do not understand the church in question and the hesitancy in both reporting the incident of child sex abuse, or why clergy have been rewarded with maintaining their positions of service after hiding an the incident of pedophilia on their staffs, and I said so on my blog at the time. My consideration of all angles will not take away the wrongness of those who committed crimes – and for you to suggest that some have that position on this thread is unfounded and spurious. Consider this please.
Rob