An Insubstantial Post tagged:

An Insubstantial Post

Posted by in Uncategorized

I got nothing. No profound thoughts. No insightful questions. Nothing. At least, not anything related to the Southern Baptist Convention or local churches.

My daughter was married last Saturday and that event has been the focal point of my life for the last few days. The wedding itself went off without any problems; the ceremony was wonderful and my daughter was beautiful (that’s her at right). Sunday afternoon my daughter and new son-in-law stopped by so she could pack for the honeymoon. Moments later, his parents arrived to pack up their car and his with all of my daughter’s stuff. (We live in Tulsa, his parents live in Dallas, and the kids will be in Houston).

At one point my daughter was in her room packing and crying. My wife was trying very hard not to cry. By the time I got back from taking the kids to the airport, my wife was crying. Inconsolable tears. The kind of sobbing where I was concerned she would forget to breathe.

So here I sit on New Year’s day too exhausted to move but my head spinning with thoughts. So in no particular order – and with no attempt to offer any spiritual analogies or metaphors – I offer some random thoughts about weddings, daughters, wives, marriage, love and life.

I spent more money than I should have on this wedding (although, it was less than half of the average wedding in our area) and will happily do it for the other two daughters. She was princess for a day: she was the center of attention and loved every minute of it.

Even though she was surrounded by gorgeous 20-somethings all dressed to kill, my wife was still the prettiest girl in the room. Somehow I became old and gray and fat but she still lights up any room she’s in.

Sometimes there is nothing we can do, guys, except hold our wives, say nothing, and let them cry. We can’t always fix things.

One person’s grief and loss is another’s joy: littlest sister not only gets the big bedroom, she is now an “only child”.

I find change exciting and exhilarating; not everyone else does.

It is likely that someone will feel slighted and allow their feelings to be hurt. If there is a blended family involved, change that to “it is inevitable”. If it is my blended family (my parents have been divorced for nearly 30 years) change that to “I guarantee someone will get their feelings hurt”.

Thirty years is way too long for that kind of nonsense to go on: no wonder I specialize in high conflict relationships in my counseling practice.

The house is much quieter with only one daughter at home instead of three. Much, much quieter.

The hardest part of the weekend for me was not seeing my daughter exchange vows or sending them off on their honeymoon. The hardest part was seeing my youngest child all dressed up as a bridesmaid. She’s supposed to be forever eight years old; she’s not supposed to grow up and become a young woman.

My mother and my mother-in-law grilled the boyfriends of my other two daughters. They were merciless. I’m glad I never had to face a team of grandmothers when my wife and I were dating. The fact that both boys have been around the last two days speaks highly of their character.

One down, two to go.